First, before I am accused of being a Scrooge, I’d like to point out that I do tip. I nearly always tip 15%, and often tip more if I really like the service or restaurant.
In theory, though, I am opposed to the practice of tipping for a couple of reasons.
If it’s expected, it’s no longer a gratuity. It seems like the societal expectation is to tip 15% unless the service is just dreadful (they pour a drink on your head — on purpose). Thus a custom that once helped customers by giving an incentive to employees to provide a high level of service doesn’t really provide that value any more. You’ll still get the great servers who chase the 20%+ tips (or simply have great pride in their work), but there are quite a few servers who seem to just cruise along doing the minimum, confident that they’ll get 15% anyway.
I even fall into this trap. I almost always tip 15%. The last time I tipped less was about a year ago at the local IHOP. We were incorrectly charged for omelet ingredients. I pointed this out to the waitress, who insisted I was wrong. Since I often eat the exact same omelet, I was sure that I was not wrong. I politely requested that she bring a menu to the table so that we could resolve the issue. For a reason that eludes logic, she refused to do this. At this point, I said “Fine. I know that we are being overcharged, so I’ll just deduct the excess from your tip, since you’re refusing to verify the price.” Even this didn’t compel her to make an effort to satisfy the customer. I have no doubt that this woman is still overcharging people — most of whom are tipping her 15% for her service.
It’s deceptive, and pretty random. I certainly know why restaurant owners like tipping. They can list a meal at $14.95 when it will realistically cost the customer $17.25. Granted, you know what you’re getting into when you walk into a restaurant, but I still see it as a bit of a mind trick, particularly when it comes to advertising.
A larger problem I have is the randomness of the tipping system. I’m supposed to tip the server at Applebees, but not the guy at Goodyear, who points out potential problems with my car and always makes an effort to make my 2 year old daughter feel important by talking to her? Or maybe I AM supposed to tip the Goodyear guy? I’m supposed to tip the person cutting my hair, unless they happen to be the owner, in which case I shouldn’t tip? (What if I don’t know who the owner is? I’m glad I cut my own hair.)
Even within the restaurant industry, there doesn’t seem to be a strong correlation between the size of the tip and the value provided. At one of the steakhouses in town, the server is going to get a tip of about $7 each time my wife and I go there ($3.50 per person).
On the flip side, when I travel to my corporate headquarters on business and eat at my all time favorite restaurant (Monical’s), the bill comes to $8.82. 15% of that would be $1.33 – 40% of my share of the steakhouse tip. Obviously, I leave more than $1.33, but there’s a clear imbalance. If I leave the $3.50 that the steakhouse server receives as a tip on my half of the bill, its becomes a 40% tip on the Monicals bill — and the waitress will think I’m trying to hit on her.
Ah, but the steakhouse server deserves more because they provide more service, right? Actually, no. They take the order, bring me a drink, and deliver the entrée to my table. The salads are dreadful at this place, so they’re spared that work.
On the flip side, at Monical’s, they do more work because they do bring me a salad. Not only that, but they bring me the salad to my specifications (just lettuce and cheese — no tomatoes or carrots). They’re also much more friendly than the steakhouse servers (not that the steakhouse servers are dour; they’re just not quite as chipper).
So, then, remind me why society strongly suggests tipping the steakhouse person nearly three times as much?
What’s my solution? How would I propose to fix the situation? Pay servers (and other tip-based employees) a far wage (rather than the $2/hr that is allowed in some states) and make tipping an option intended to reward service above and beyond the expected level, rather than the meat and potatoes of their compensation. It seems only fair to put the majority of the cost of employment on the actual employer — the person who receives the most benefit from the employee.
SVB: I’m honored to have Kosmo as my guest writer for today. His post compels me to ask: where’s that tip jar again? Kosmo is an aspiring novelist, vehement opponent of the designated hitter, student of true crime, and plays the keyboard for The Casual Observer — an eclectic, team-written web magazine.
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{ 38 comments… read them below or add one }
The post just touched my nerves. I remember how I got literally ostracized and labeled cheap at my company in CT for putting across the exact same point. I kept saying why not tip the janitor, the ups guy, the mailman. Why is it that only food service folks get the tips. The owners already make over 50% margin and if they don’t pay proper wages, then hell go legal on them. Why the heck is the consumer punished for this. There have been cases where the servers or more occasionally bartenders actually cursed the customer on their face for their tips. Tip only if you feel the service is exceptional. At least this will ensure that along with food the service qualities are also high.
– V
I agree, they should be paid a decent wage and get tips on top of that. Even if it is a small bill I usually leave at least $4.00 and I usually leave $1-$2 at a buffet and if it is some place we frequent it usually gets the $4. I also don’t think it is fair that many restaurants pool tips so even people doing an exceptionally poor job get the same amount.
This article really did make outstanding points. It’s not about the issue of tipping, but what it really represents and what it’s there for. It’s a strange practice we have here, especially since you don’t have this set up in other countries.
Here’s another interesting point of discussion: people of other cultures who visit and live in the U.S. don’t necessarily understand the point of tipping. In fact, there are some folks I know who refrain from tipping altogether because of those cultural differences and they don’t really “get” the reason behind it; so they don’t feel compelled enough to make adjustments to their conduct as consumers. This is why you get a lot of racial stereotypes with regards to this matter, which you’ll hear about in many establishments and restaurants.
I do believe that the onus of compensation should be placed on the entrepreneur and business owner rather than the consumer. It’s yet another weird system that deserves an overhaul (following what should happen to the health care system (and insurance industry) in this country).
Thanks for the guest post opportunity, SVB. the tip jar cartoon that you linked in the header made me laugh – especially since I myself have tip jars for my writers. They’re really well hidden, though, and we don’t charge an automatic tip for large parties 🙂
As a token of appreciate for Digerati Life reader, I’m offering a 25% off coupon for purchases in my store (excluding the tip jars for obvious reasons). Just use code DIGLIFE25 during checkout. That knocks the cost of my newest eBooklet (a 9 page guide to short story writing) down to 74 cents – with a money back guarantee 🙂
@ BRB – Yeah, the idea of tip pooling doesn’t make a lot of sense. I’d be a bit annoyed if I gave a generous tip to a server doing a good job, and that person had to hand over some of it to another person who is doing a mediocre job. At this point, the tip isn’t a gratuity, it’s just an hourly wage that gets shifted from employer to customer.
I don’t have a problem with paying $X for my meal. Just put $X on the menu item, rather than 85% of X, with the assumption that I’ll tip the rest.
Great article Kosmo. I feel the same way about tipping. It’s confusing and uneven at the very best. My wife tips her hair stylist at least $2- regardless…..WTF??? I can cut her hair, charge $80 and pull a $20 tip and I’ll feel really good about it. =)
I love the thought about tipping the service guy. There is a high value provided by them and often a shop will include a 28 point inspection with an oil change for no additional cost.
I think if I had the IHOP experience you did the server would have scored a ZERO tip. Just deducting the difference was not nearly harsh enough. Any goodwill that had been built up prior to her refusal to bring a menu would have been depleted. I would have promptly hailed the manager and made sure he/she understood how criminal the service provided was.
Monicals is the best and I too tip them well above the 20% mark.
Good food for thought!!!! Thanks!
I agree with this post. Tipping has lost it’s meaning, a thank you for outstanding service. I too have wondered why tipping is almost expected at restaurants and not other places (Like fast food, car mechanic…oh and how about your doctor, or your lawyer, or accountant?). I usually do not tip, mostly because I am unemployed and come from a family where we very rarely went out to eat at a nicer sit down place. I simply cannot afford to tip. I budget out how much I am going to spend on a meal, nothing more.
I believe if you are offering a service, you always have high respect and quality of service to your customers. We are what keep them in business anyway. If they don’t like that I already paid the advertised price for a meal or service and expect more, I’ll take my money somewhere else.
@Kosmo,
Oooh! Thanks for offering the coupon! That’s all in the spirit of what we do here. 🙂 Discounts are always welcome… and great. Thanks for the great post. You put into such eloquent words what many of us have been pondering every time we enter a service establishment.
Honestly, tipping is one of those things where people can debate about for hours. You have those who have been in the restaurant business and who have seen everything from those who just want good service. I’ve worked in a restaurant and I can say that we appreciate the tips. However, I would have to agree that if there was a server who wasn’t giving you the satisfactory service (or an extremely rude one like the server you had to deal with at Ihop) you deserve, then don’t tip as much. It’s understandable. But yes, I agree as well that at certain places tipping is no longer meaningful- not to the employee and not to the unsatisfied customer as well. If I were you, I would contact Ihop’s Corporate offices and complain about that incident because that is no way to be treated.
@ Squeaky – I love the Goodyear guys. I have seen them talk panicky people out of expensive repairs. “No, really, we fixed the problem at the bill is $16 in labor. No need to replace the transmission.” When I see them do this for other people, it makes me think that they’re not adding anything extra onto my bill.
Actually, now that I think about it, they did this to me, too. I had an emission issue. The told me up front that replacing a certain part might not fix it. And it didn’t. So they ordered the other (more expensive) part. I combe back in for the repair.
The repair is supposed to take about an hour. Five minutes later, my car is finished. I’m a bit confused and ask if they had the correct service schedule.
At which point, the embarrassed technician admitted that he hadn’t gotten some connections tight at the end of the other repair job. They very easily could have replaced the second part – that’s precisly what I was expecting them to do.
Try tipping in Australia. They are almost insulted since they are paid a fair wage.
In the US, most waiters and waitresses don’t get paid much of an hourly wage so the tip is where they earn the majority of their money. I don’t think a diner should feel obligated to leave 15% or 20% no matter what kind of service they get. The amount of tip should reflect the personalized attention provided the diners and be a reflection of the dining experience. Lousy service…. 0 – 5%….. great service 15 – 30%…… but beauty is in the eye of the beholder.
I do think the tipping system in the USA is pretty screwed up. But its the system that we have so we are basically stuck with it.
Two more points that make it even more convoluted:
1) The basic argument for tipping is that servers don’t get the minimum wage. In most states servers get below minimum wage and the tips are expected to make up for the short fall. However in 7 of the 50 states servers get the full minimum wage. So the person bringing you coffee and eggs at IHOP may be making $2 an hour but if yu move across a state line they might make $8.
2) I’ve noticed a trend where a restaurant will 2, 3 or more people who will perform serving duties. One person might swing by to get your drink order, another gets your food order, a third brings the actual food, etc. What happens when one of the 3-4 people screws up but the others do great? Do you cut the tip and punish them all?
Be aware of your own unconscious tipping tendencies. It may be expected in many situations, but tipping is never required.
My rule of thumb is to tip well when you are satisfied. If your waiter or waitress does a good job, then reward them with a great tip. If they are just there for a job, then I give them the bare minimum!
You make a great suggestion. The restaurants should pay the employees a fair wage and a tip should be an incentive. The only person that wins here is the restaurant who gets cheap labor.
@ Jim – you comment got me thinking. Here is the full table of mimimum wages for tipped employees, by state (on the US Dept of Labor web site). It’s quite the hodgepodge.
http://www.dol.gov/whd/state/tipped.htm
In Washington State, tipped employees are receiving a mininum cash wage of $8.55 per hour. This drops to as low as $2.13 in some states. My state (Iowa) is in the middle, at $4.35.
New York state breaks it down by type of employee. Food service workers and chambermaids get different wages.
After reading al the comments, I agree with Percy- your tip shoud be reflective of the service you received. Tip, which stand for “To Insure Proper Service” has been a long standing way to reward someone for doing a good or great job. 15% is only a guideline, and should be reflected as such. As to who to tip? Anyone you think has done an outstanding job for you and you want to reward and recognize. The Goodyear guy can work just as hard for you as your waitress, and should be recognized for it. It has nothing to do with if they are getting $2 an hour or minimum wage…if they worked hard for you, recognize them. And if they earned minimum wage? So what…ever try waitering? Even a mediocre serviceperson is worth twice that- try it sometime and remember how you spoke or treated your serviceperson- THAT’S sure to change your attitude. Loosen up…we’re all just trying to make a living…
@ Neal – yes, I’ve worked in the food service industry. An average server definitely earns their money. Some of them, however, make the experience WORSE – they provide negative value. This is the exception, rather than the rule, but it does happen. If a server is rude, never refills drinks, and brings out the food when it’s already cold, I don’t see why they should be tipped anything at all. They’ve turned a $15 meal into a $5 meal (oh, yay – cold steak) through their lack of attentiveness.
I have no problem with waiters making a higher wage – but why not put the onus on the employer? They are the main benficiary of the employee’s work – without the servers, they make no money. This may also cause them to fire the poorest employers. If you’re paying an employee $2.13 an hour, you can put up with a lot of crap from them, because it’s still very cheap labor for your business. If you’re paying them $8 per hour, maybe you look around for better options.
Either way, the cost is going to get passed on to me – I just want it to be transparent.
I’m pretty sure that my Goodyear doesn’t accept tips, but I might check it out.
I typically leave 15-20% tip for meals at restaurants regardless of where I go. If the person is very pleasant and courteous, I have given even more from time to time.
However, if I get a server who’s just mad at the world and you can sense that they despise being in your presence for some reason and service is horrible, I will tip only 10% or less to give ‘a sign’ in a sense that I recognize that they are still doing the job – just not that well.
Nice post.
The only time i tip the waiters is if the service was exceptional and no other reason.
Completely agree with the frustration in your post. They rarely tip anywhere else in the world. Travel to other countries and you’ll see that they deliver the same level of service without the tip. Why can’t we institute a similar business model? The consumer is stuck with paying way too much and the tip is meaningless nowadays.
Kosmo – Thanks for the article, and especially for the DOL link for information by state.
I’ve always been one that will only tip when service was above ‘basic’ level. If I’m just getting base level service, why pay more? Otherwise I do start at ~15% or so, but have no problems leaving 25%+ if the service was outstanding.
Reading through the info for payments by state, I’m even more emboldened to feel that I don’t have to automatically leave a tip. I live in WA, and generally travel to OR and CA; all three of which tipped employees get at least minimum wage. Yes, I know tips can add up quite well, but still rather frightening to think of base pay at $2.13/hr.
Oh, and gotta say, I did enjoy my trip to China for a few weeks last year. No tipping expected nor wanted, and sometimes given back if you tried.
Keep in mind that if restaurants paid decent wages, they would have to increase prices for food and customers would end up paying the same amount anyway.
@Amelia,
I would still prefer restaurants to bear the brunt of the costs. If it’s a good restaurant, they’ll be worth every penny to visit. They also have the power to hire only the best servers. The market will speak for itself. Much easier to gauge things this way. JMO.
Tipping is confusing to me as well. 15% seems to be the standard but like you had pointed out it is a standard that is applied to only a few industries. When a gas attendant pumps my gas for me, they don’t get a tip. Maybe that is a touchy topic altogether but I think you get my point.
Is it wrong when I go to the local coffee shop drive through and I don’t leave a tip if the service is slow or the person taking my order through the speaker was less then happy to be speaking with me? Don’t get me wrong — this happens rarely. But when it does I collect my change and pull away. When I do get decent service I give them all the silver (.25 .10 .5) and the pennies. This usually surpasses the 15% standard tip.
At restaurants if the service is slow or the person serving us is not very helpful, then it is reflected in my tip.
When tipping in today’s economy we should be considering if the service is worth the tip. After all, a few dollars in my pocket is better then a few dollars in someone else’s.
That’s my .02 cents worth 🙂
The first time I went to the US I couldn’t understand why I got such dirty looks from the restaurant staff. I found out later (many years later) why, and that is because the US allows restaurants to pay slave wages to their staff. This is totally ridiculous in my opinion.
A national study conducted by Mediacurves.com explored opinions of 1,192 Americans regarding tipping. Results found that on average, Democrats leave larger tips than Republicans and Independents when receiving service in restaurants. Among religious affiliation, Jewish people reported leaving the largest average tip percentage based on the total bill. More results can be seen here.
I live in NYC and waitressed all through college and high school. For those of you who have never worked in the service industry, please let me point out to you that being a server is extremely difficult. Tipping is good manners — and how servers make a living. People who tip the minimum 15% annoy me. If you can’t afford to go out and tip well, then don’t go out. Servers are on their feet for 8 – 10 hour shifts, dealing with rude and difficult people like yourselves. Stop being so stingy. Generosity goes a long way.
If I know the tip is going to the staff and the service was good then I’m always generous, but if the service was bad then that reflects the tip. 🙂
Some occupations require a good tip and should be given one for the service they provided or just out of common generosity. Many occupations they are known for receiving tips have a low basic wage anyway so they really need this added bonus.
As a waiter in a fine dining restaurant, i take my job knowing that I work for tips and my money is not guaranteed. This is a known risk, and i take pride in my work and do the absolute best job i can with the experience that i have. Typically, this will result in an appropriate tip. I also research the restaurant that I work for to assure the type of clientele that I find to appropriately match my service level, which in turn provides the percentage of tip i wish to make on average.
With tipping etiquette, the tip percentage is typically reflected in the type of restaurant you are dining in. The tip percentage varies based on the level of service and food/beverages a restaurant provides along with the level of knowledge a server is required to have about the product they are serving.
In a casual low cost restaurant, you will find 15% is acceptable – this type of restaurant is known as a “turn and burn” restaurant for servers that work there… High volume of low budget customers & low cost food = difficult fast paced work with a high level of mental and physical multitasking ability to earn a decent amount of money, and not surprisingly – the clientelle is typically lazy and unhappy in life, which results in a very demanding unsatisfiable customer.
In a corporate/chain restaurant, You will find 15-20% acceptable. Once again, prices can vary to attract a wide variety of clientele, from your typical cheap eats bargain hunter to an average diner who is looking to enjoy an adequate dining experience. Training and regulations are rigid in these restaurants, and they are also known as a turn and burn restaurant as the volume of customers is high. Typically with the clientelle you can expect anywhere from the ignorant 10% tip to a fair 18 or 20% tip.
Casual Fine Dining – You will find 18-25% acceptable. Higher training standards, high quality food, typically privately owned. The kitchen staff has quality training, and the food is something of which a server can recommend with pride and with as much knowledge about the menu as the kitchen staff. You will find servers that have a true interest in food and alcohol, and the ability to perfectly recommend a dish paired with a wine to make your dining experience great. A customer should expect a relaxed 1-2 hour dining experience with a well mannered and experienced server. In a rush? Perhaps you should dine elsewhere. Tight on cash? Check a nearby fastfood establishment or stay at home, fine dining is a luxury. Have a strict 15% tipping policy? You don’t deserve this level of service and the work they put into it.
Fine Dining – Once again a dining -experience-, not just dinner. You pay for the atmosphere, the service, the unique and high quality menu, the expertise of the kitchen, the knowledge and pride of the people that work there… The servers don’t come here for a job to pay their way through college, this is a career at this level. Expect to tip 20-30%. Think this is outrageous? You probably should stick with your typical chain restaurants and forget about this level of dining. You get what you pay for.
A server gets what they work for. Want more money? Work hard and earn the right to work for a restaurant that has appropriate/educated clientelle and the menu price range for the money you desire.
A customer gets what they pay for. Want better service and food? You have to spend more. If you cannot afford this level of service and the appropriate tip percentage that goes with it, you should just deal with the fact that you can’t experience the higher levels of dining and move on.
In the US – servers work for tips, not wages… thats how it is and it will not change simply because you can’t afford what you desire. With your current job and education level, would it be okay for your boss (the customer) to decide day by day how much you make hourly based on whatever they judge is fair, or whatever they feel like paying based on their own personal situations, or perhaps they just felt you werent performing 110% but failed to realize that you were covering for your own work and another co-workers inability to do their job… (similar to a server that gets improperly seated by the host too quickly to provide quality service to all of their guests, or a server that has to rely on a slow bartender that cannot quickly get drinks out which affects the servers money and the happiness of their guests, or… a kitchen that made a mistake and once again the server takes the aggression of the customer and makes less money.)
The ignorance of the customer… while most servers at a high end level strive to provide a wonderful dining experience for every single guest no matter what, the ignorance of the customer… is truly frustrating.
“In the US – servers work for tips, not wages… thats how it is and it will not change simply because you can’t afford what you desire.”
It’s not an issue of being able to afford it. I have no problem paying the total bill + tip. I simply think that it’s a deceptive pricing practice. Roll it into the amount and put the actual price on the menu.
“You pay for the atmosphere, the service, the unique and high quality menu, the expertise of the kitchen, the knowledge and pride of the people that work there”
You’re right. It makes sense for me to pay the restaurant to provide these services. The restaurant could then hire people to provide these services and pay them. Am I dealing with one business or two when I dine out?
If tipping makes you angry, then you’re cheap. Sorry, that’s the definition. If you don’t like the idea of being cheap, start tipping better. If you are proud of being cheap, then I’d suggest you move to England, where cheapness is apparently considered a virtue.
If you receive adequate service you should tip 15%. Servers live on their tips and work very hard. Most don’t realize that servers have to tip out everyone else in the restaurant that means that if you leave no tip or a small tip the server will actually be paying for you to sit at their table. If your bill is $50 the server will be giver the restaurant 1.50 regardless of if they receive a tip or not.
@ Adrian – I suggest you read the article more closely. It’s the act of the employer shifting costs to the customer (artificially lowering the “price”) that annoys me. I don’t mind paying for the service – but roll it into the posted price and be transparent about it. I get full-service experience from most business owners – why is a restaurant different than a hardware store? Yet, the hardware store is honest with his prices – rolling the true cost into what is displayed on the shelf.
Thank you for your insight! As a server who loves her job, it sucks working for tips sometimes. Not only do we make below minimum wage (which makes me feel like a lesser-person), but we are required to “tip-out” the other staff members (kitchen, bar, host, busser and sometimes the managers). Regardless of what we make in tips on any given day, a specific percentage of our sales has to be ‘paid’ to the other staff. They could do the worst job in the world, be lazy, unfriendly, etc. and we’d still have to split and share the tips with them.
Besides that, people don’t often tip based on the service anymore. I absolutely love working as a server (though I won’t be one forever), and I try my hardest to give the best service I can in every respect. But the percentage left differs greatly throughout the day/night. Some tables leave 4% (which I don’t see any of, since I “tip-out” 4%), and some people leave 10% (average tip), and a few leave 15% or more.
It’s a shame that restaurants can get away paying people less because of the tipping situation. I’d be happy to do the same job for a higher wage if I wasn’t guaranteed gratuities. But, I’m sure a lot of people wouldn’t be.
I don’t tip. period. Unless the service and the food is so above average as to the establishment’s employees earning a bonus of a tip.
I don’t tip for the following reason –
The server works for the restaurant. what they agree to be compensated is between them and their boss. I have no part and no interest in that discussion.
For restaurant owners – let’s make a deal – hire competent people and pay them what they are worth and work that into your process and proclaim no tipping. See above, I could care less what you pay your employees. Give me quality for the price you advertise. Not your price and then i am expected to pay additional.
To servers, don’t like the wages, quit. I unloaded trucks through high school and college – guess what – I never was tipped. I didn’t expect any tips. I was paid what my boss and I agreed to. Stop whining and GTFU. You took the job, you agreed to a certain from your BOSS. Accept that pay or get out.
I am sick and tired of crybaby waiters.
Don’t like the pay get out of the business.
The latest on tipping? Tiger Woods, despite all his fame and wealth and addictions, maintains the top spot for worst celebrity tipper. The full list of bad tippers here. Some other names: Madonna, Usher, Mariah Carey, Barbra Streisand. How disappointing!
Fabulous tippers: Obama, Johnny Depp. I like to pride myself for being a more than decent tipper too. 🙂